This captures so much of the complication of growing up as a girl in a patriarchal culture. My parents were liberal but so many of my friend’s families followed what you describe. And I’ve always had such mixed feelings about the Hindu epics but esp the Ramayan for the reasons you describe! Rama is a very grey character imo. Lots of other areas though his treatment of his wife is the worst. The fight with Bali is another one which shows him as pretty bad.
This line captures so much: "it's nonsensical to imagine what 'we' would do if we were born in a vastly different time and place. It would simply not be us."
It strikes at something I've long believed: the self is not a sealed container. It is a blend of the external as well as the internal.
We are, in part, the times we were born into, the people we were surrounded by, the beliefs that were already in the air when we arrived.
Which means goodness isn't just a personal achievement. If our selves are partly constituted by the social fabric around us, then a culture that nurtures good beliefs quietly lifts everyone embedded in it : not through persuasion, but through osmosis.
The work of making people "better" may be less about appealing to individual conscience and more about tending to the commons: the shared norms, stories, and structures we all absorb without realizing it.
A rising tide of collective goodness raises the internal self along with it.
Ajeya, here's a paper pointing out that the forces dragging us towards the good and true have a price: https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=6194078 Yes, we may be unable to resist becoming good and true, but the price we must pay to get there deserves to be mentioned.
This captures so much of the complication of growing up as a girl in a patriarchal culture. My parents were liberal but so many of my friend’s families followed what you describe. And I’ve always had such mixed feelings about the Hindu epics but esp the Ramayan for the reasons you describe! Rama is a very grey character imo. Lots of other areas though his treatment of his wife is the worst. The fight with Bali is another one which shows him as pretty bad.
Beautifully written, Ajeya.
This line captures so much: "it's nonsensical to imagine what 'we' would do if we were born in a vastly different time and place. It would simply not be us."
It strikes at something I've long believed: the self is not a sealed container. It is a blend of the external as well as the internal.
We are, in part, the times we were born into, the people we were surrounded by, the beliefs that were already in the air when we arrived.
Which means goodness isn't just a personal achievement. If our selves are partly constituted by the social fabric around us, then a culture that nurtures good beliefs quietly lifts everyone embedded in it : not through persuasion, but through osmosis.
The work of making people "better" may be less about appealing to individual conscience and more about tending to the commons: the shared norms, stories, and structures we all absorb without realizing it.
A rising tide of collective goodness raises the internal self along with it.
I dug out this paper where I first encountered this: https://www.alice.id.tue.nl/references/clark-chalmers-1998.pdf (hope you like it)
Ajeya, here's a paper pointing out that the forces dragging us towards the good and true have a price: https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=6194078 Yes, we may be unable to resist becoming good and true, but the price we must pay to get there deserves to be mentioned.
Liked the article mostly for the honest number 3 citation