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akash's avatar

Super relatable. The feeling of not doing enough is likely core to many who are drawn to EA.

From the outside tho, your impact seems huge. At Tucson Effective Altruism, we would share your 2016 intro presentation as well as readings from Cold Takes and Planned Obsolescence each semester!

Imagine how many others found your work important and you just don’t know about it

Lorenzo's avatar

It's still the most viewed video on https://www.youtube.com/@EffectiveAltruismOfficial/videos 9 years later

Tzu Kit Chan's avatar

indeed! i helped a shit ton of EA groups and i fondly told them "just reference that Ajeya video" (for giving an intro-to-EA workshop post-tabling fair)

Michel Justen's avatar

You're an inspiration! I appreciate that you leave time to write these personal reflections alongside your hustle. I hope you get as much from them as we do.

Alicia Pollard's avatar

This really resonated - thank you so much for writing!

Tzu Kit Chan's avatar

dang, i felt the weight of your shoulders (and tears); i imagine both the younger and "grown-up EAs" (i consider myself here) can resonate with your inspirational story; it sounds like the goalposts of "having done enough" for many of us will likely only keep shifting higher / further .. and you're right, at least we're not alone in the trenches!

keep going ajeya.

Marko Schmitt's avatar

I really like how you've shared your process. It's inspiring you had the guts to act on what your intuition was telling you versus what anyone else thinks.

The audience for this report are the people who are trying to create authentic lives for themselves. Well done.

Sheikh Abdur Raheem Ali's avatar

You’re an inspiration, Ajeya!

The Co-evolution's avatar

Loved this reflection and such relatable feelings. I have pushed myself to the edge of my own death (figuratively and not) through a similar chase. Ambition and the desire for more, at the end of the day are parts of the ego. They are double edge sword. After working for year through internalizing this, I’ve come to learn that I didn’t have to attach myself so tightly to this “calling” in order to find what I was looking for.

I highly recommend the book The Other Shore from Thich Nhat Hanh. It may not make sense at first, and if that’s the case, read it again ☺️